SABATO ASSESSMENTS

Chill Wizzy quizzy: you get credit, not a grade, so don't get all nervous. If you have questions you'd like to see, just let us know via the comment section.

One; why does Tolkien spell fairy, "faerie".
A. He had a rare form of dyslexia which went undetected until he became a professor of literature.
B. He was trying to avoid the search engines, as he had stolen most of his ideas from Milton, Shelley and Longfellow.
C. Faerie is actually the way angels write the word if they have graduated college.
D. He just did, no one knows why. This is why Sam Eagle used to walk into inklings meetings and say 'you are all weirdos" drink someone elses' fruit punch, then leave, slamming the door in a rather boorish manner.

Question two: Tolkien has the following opinion about the land of Faerie:
A. its swampy and mosquito ridden and not worth the price of a campsite.
B. Since Faerie has no treaty with the European Union, there's a high risk of being stranded there in the event of a breakdown in negotiations.
C. Faerie is a fascinating realm, which he loves to visit when possible and does not ask too many questions for fear the inahbitants will ban him.
D. Have you got a screw loose?

Question Three: According to Tolkien's research, faerie is:
A. Heaven.
B. Hell.
C. Fenway Park.
D. None of the above.

Question Four, while his friend CS Lewis proposed that the entrance to Faerie might be through a closet door, Tolkien suggested that you could only get there with the permission and counsel of:
A. Gandalf.
B. Frodo.
C. Ferny.
D. the gatekeeper at the village of Bree, who was often so soused that trying to wake him up was a lost cause.

In a little known story called Smith of Wooten Major, tolkien portrays himself as a non descript kid named Smith, who enters the world of faerie at the age of ten and is forever changed. (cf middle earth middle school. or Eucatastrophe in Leon: the professional.
The story of Smith has many elements that will show up in Middle Earth, including the theme of a large party centered on a huge, elaborate cake.
The Catholic faith, which played a key role in the history of England as well as Tolkien's personal history, is premised on outlandish beliefs such as a piece of bread turning into the heart of a human being instantaneously upon the recitation of certain ritual prayers. The "cake" which allows entrance into "faerie" is simlar to the engelbrott which allows entrance into paradise.
This is also similar to the "engelkuchen" made famous by fud and Tony.
this is
How does the humdrum character smith access the realm of faerie?
A. He takes a carnival cruise and it goes off course and ends up in elfland.
He eats a piece of cake containing a star.
He takes the F train, the F ferry and the F Furgone.
He gets together an archaeological expeition.

The character "alf" in the story is most likely
A. an elf from faerie.
B. an elf from Neverland. C. a middle school drop out who wanted to work for the Cake boss but the cake boss was embroiled in Jersey related turf wars.
D. the 2022 reboot of an old muppet named Alf, from melmac, who has come to warn the inhabitants of wooten major not to get in a war with Sauron unless they make sure the alfs are allies first.

Smith of Wooten first eats the star when he is approximately how many years old A. Five B. Ten. C. fifteen. D. Twenty one but he's not looking for a new Wooten.
He realizes Faerie is dangerous because A. there are volcanic mountain ranges where you can get lost. B. There are tidal waves that throw boats up on shores. C. There are windstorms that ruin birch trees. D. All of the above.
EXTRA CREDIT IN CASE YOU FEEL LIKE IT: Smith does not tell many people about his adventurees in Faerie because A. he forgot. B. They don't speak English. C. They think he's crazy. D. The Faeries sold the rights to a movie studio called "fabuzzo films limited."